asylum-art

asylum-art:

How To Recognise Famous Painters According To The Internet

Art history has never been so easy! Reddit user DontTacoBoutIt  posted a series of famous paintings and gave short but hilariously accurate explanations on how to recognize their authors. According to him, Da Vinci’s works can be recognized by the bluish mist and locations reminiscent of Lord of The Rings movies, while Rubens’paintings can be identified by the figures’ large behinds.

Though some may fault them for being gross over-generalizations, these descriptions take the recognizable essence of each painter’s work and put it in very easy words that anyone can understand and, more importantly, remember.

But even more exciting is that commenters on Reddit and Imgur started sharing their own ideas for artist identification. It seems like they won’t stop until every artist in the world is explained. 

  1. If it’s something you saw on your acid trip last night, it’s Dali
  2. If you see a ballerina, it’s Degas.
  3. If every painting is the face of a uni-browed woman, it’s Frida.
  4. Dappled light but no figures, it’s Monet.
  5. If everybody has some sort of body malfunction, then it’s Picasso.
  6. Dappled light and happy party-time people, it’s Renoir.
  7. If everyone is beautiful, naked, and stacked, it’s Michelangelo.
  8. If everyone in the paintings has enormous asses, then it’s Rubens.
  9. it’s If the painting could easily have a few chubby Cupids or sheep added (or already has them), it’s Boucher.
  10. If everything is highly-contrasted and sharp, sort of bluish, and everyone has gaunt bearded faces, it’s El Greco.

Source: imgur and boredpanda

genuine-insanity

retrogradeworks:

castielonfire:

marina-and-the-carbon:

heartofalifer:

SOMETIMES I GET SO FUCKING ANGRY WHEN I REMEMBER THAT I AM A GIRL BECAUSE MY MONEY HAS TO GO TO BUYING BRAS FOR THESE STUPID ORGANIC MILK BAGS AND PADS FOR MONTHLY UNWANTED SUBSCRIPTION OF LUCIFER’S WATERFALL LIKE WTF MAN WHY DONT THESE THINGS COME FREE WHEN MY UNWANTED PACKAGE IS GIVEN TO ME SERIOUSLY THO

Lucifer’s waterfall is the best description of periods I have ever heard

organic milk bags

LUCIFER’S WATERFALL

katlywi

katlywi:

When you start passing out from cramps because the pain is too unbearable and you might have to get surgery because your organs are STICKING TOGETHER because of the excess tissue your fucking vagina is making and you might have to go into early menopause and never have children THEN you can relate to me bc your cramps are sooo bad you have to take one midol :( bye